BREAKING NEWS

🚨PRESS ROOM PANIC!🚨

Chaos erupted this morning inside the Fantasy Squad newsroom after Ramzilla’s first loss of the season.
Moments after the final score was confirmed, witnesses say the Copier Press started flashing red lights and displaying the error code: “Low Confidence — Please Reboot Team.”

Production of Edition No. 9 came to an abrupt stop when our Press Guy tried to print the headline and the machine simply sighed, jammed, and ejected a crumpled stat sheet that read “It was bound to happen.”

Our top Copier Press Technician is currently on-site armed with toner, tape, and an emotional support screwdriver. Reportedly, he’s been muttering something about “rebuilding morale and clearing paper jams—both physical and emotional.”

Operations are expected to resume later today once the newsroom’s systems—and spirits—have been successfully rebooted.
Until then, fans are encouraged to remain calm, hydrate, and avoid making eye contact with any Ramzilla players.

Edition No. 9 will be released later today—stay tuned for updates once the smoke clears from the press room.